There was this guy on Twitter who sent me flowers every week for a while.

About a month ago, we met in person for the first time and went to dinner. Then he asked me out again. I thanked him and honestly told him that I didn't think we were a good fit for each other in the long run and that we shouldn't continue.

Since then he has never sent me flowers.

It's always helpful to get a chance to see a person's true character when they stop thinking they can get what they want from you.

After all, someone who truly cares about your happiness would continue to send flowers.

«The world used to be run by smart people. It was cruel. The smart people forced the dumb people to study. It was hard for the dumb people. Now the world is run by dumb people. It's fair, because there are far more dumb people. Now the smart people learn to speak in a way that dumb people can understand. If a dumb person doesn't understand something, it's the smart people's problem.»

Before, it was the stupid who suffered. Now it's the smart who suffer. There's less suffering because there are fewer and fewer smart people."

Are you working, losers?

Nigerian prince left me 14 billion dollars. Now I'm transferring $2,000 for the paperwork and so long, losers!

Just how? How in a blue hell do man like this do it? I personally would NEVER be able to, ever. Emotionally would be impossible to marry someone like this. What do you think? Would you be able to?

I'm the only one who can't understand how lawyers refrain from saying «fuck you» or «you were not there — so shut your fucking mouth» when in court...

In a zombie apocalypse, the first thing you need to do is run to the sports store and grab all the protein!

Firstly, who knows how long it lasts.

Secondly, in a post-apocalyptic world, protein is in short supply, and protein doesn't make you hungry for a long time.

Thirdly, protein powder jars are big, so you can store anything in them. Or you can cut holes in them and wear them on your hands and head for protection!

I understand, the idea is brilliant, but I'm shocked myself.

I've manipulated my husband by strategically sleeping with him for more than 20 years

I've been married for going on 30 years. Many, many years ago I realized that on the weekends if I got up in the morning and did whatever I needed to do (made breakfast, took care of kids, cleaned, etc) my husband would just stay in bed all day and watch TV. If I wanted to take the kids somewhere, or suggested we go shopping or hiking or hang out with friends or literally anything, my husband would say he's worked hard all week and he wants to just relax, so we'd do nothing all weekend long. BUT if I started the morning by sleeping with him, shortly after we were done he'd get up and take a shower and be ready to go conquer the world.

So if I want to have a lazy day at home, I get up and do whatever I want. But if I want to go do something, I sleep with him first thing in the morning. I know I'm intentionally manipulating him, and I don't actually care because I feel like he's getting what he wants, and so am I.